“Sounds like they’re singing about you.”

She ain't got no money
Her clothes are kinda funny
Her hair is kinda wild and free
Oh, but love grows where my Rosemary goes
And nobody knows like me

She talks kinda lazy
And people say she's crazy
And her life's a mystery
Oh, but love grows where my Rosemary goes
And nobody knows like me

There's something about her hand holding mine
It's a feeling that's fineAnd I just gotta say
She's really got a magical spell
And it's working so well
That I can't get away

Edison Lighthouse. Youtube it.

It’s a strange moment, this one.

A moment of waiting. Just waiting.
Because that’s the only thing I can do.
But it’s not a waiting in silence. Or a waiting in question.
It’s a waiting for a wave of circumstances to hit me.
And I can’t do anything, but hold my ground and face it like a big girl.
I kind of know what to do.
Hold my breath. Kick a little. Paddle a little. Wave my arms around a bit.
But will I sink or swim?
Only time will tell.
Ok, here it comes. I can see it now.

Obscene fruit.

When the fridge is stocked fruit every Monday, I grab a few and leave it on my table for snack attacks.

A large jambu with a very red and very rounded butt.
Two China pears (those greenish-reddish ones) with their stalks facing the same way.
Two oranges.
Two apples.
Two huge yellow pears.
Two ripe golden yellow melons
A banana in between two oranges.
A banana in between two apples.
A banana in between two huge yellow pears.
A banana in between two ripe golden yellow melons (yes, there they make sure there plenty of bananas every week).

Ratatat is performing.

I know, because some of the guys are spreading the word. I’m also quietly pleased that I know who they are talking about. But that’s because I have a few of their tracks on my playlist. Which were given to me, along with other random tracks. Because I was begging for some shit that wasn’t my own. Interesting sounds. But I wouldn’t be found squashed in a crowd, watching them. Much less pay 60 bucks for it.

I should go, I’m told, to experience it.
What if I don’t like it then?
Just drink until you do!

There’s a grumpoos lurking in the office.

He seems to have his favourite victims – the poor writers who are seated in the corner of the creative team. And he chooses them at random. Different times. Different reasons. But always the same terrifying manifestation of grumpiness.

Sometimes it’s simply because it’s Monday. Or that a brief is too boring. Or that auntie rose is down for a visit. Or that someone was being rude.

Exorcising this grumpoos takes a little know-how. A little ice-cream works sometimes. Or some TLC. Or a good sleep might do the trick. Or a fantastic weekend!

I’d like the claw package please.

Metal claws. 12 inches. Retractable. Will I be able to retract them one by one? And healing abilities come in the package? I don’t want to be bleeding all over the place. So, this is on special offer, right? What? No discounts? I thought this is the X-men promotion you’re advertising. Oh. What off-screen abilities are on offer then? Multiple-language abilities. What the hell am I going to do with that? Who am I going to talk to if everyone’s busy flying around? Smoke a thousand cigarettes at once?? This Super Power mall sucks!

It takes skill to steer a turbo-charged car along a twisty countryside road.

It takes skill to be a passenger in one of these rides. It’s a less developed skill than driving, but an important skill nonetheless – to significantly reduce chances of muscle aches, headaches and vomiting.

I call it the 3-point grip. Fold your right leg under the left leg and jam your left foot against the wheel well. Grab the door handle with your left hand. And lean your back against right side of the seat.

Then relax. It helps you remain calm in case of a crash.